WE DON'T WANT YOUR MAN, SO RELAX: The Five Basic Types of Girls Who Visit Strip Clubs
I've often asked many women which they would rather have; would they rather have him go to the strip club or a regular bar, with the "boys"? Most women immediately choose the latter.. Here's the thing, his chances of finding a girl to sleep with are GREATER at any average bar than they are at the strip club. Ladies, we're there to get paid to give him blue balls; after that, he's all yours, and we've already forgotten his name. The only thing we want that's in his pants is his wallet! That brings us to girl 1, the most common, and most obnoxiously frustrating female..
1) "The Babysitter"
This is the girl who comes in with her man so she can watch him and make sure he "behaves". Typically this girl is like stripper repellent because we don't want that drama and it's not like she'll "allow" her man to spend any money.. Sometimes if I'm feeling bitchy and a girl's snarl is annoying enough, I WILL go over to her man, and do my more risque floor show. Take my dollar and walk away. Sometimes you'll see these girls immediately jump on their man, give him some weird lap dance, and proceed to make out with him. We get it! He's yours!! Nobody would have taken him from you but thanks for making my work environment exceedingly uncomfortable!
2) The "Pleaser"
This is the girl who will let you take her tits out, stuff dollars in your garter, and simultaneously try to convince you to go home with her and her man. While it's fun to play along, once they've made it clear they're going home with someone (doesn't matter who), the fun stops. Ladies, gentlemen, even if many of us are bisexual, we aren't all hypersexual, or willing to take part in every offer for a threesome that comes along. We'll never admit to having a bf, hubby, etc. There's a reason why we're considered "fantasy" girls; we are here to entertain you and be social, while providing a fantasy that you can spank it to while you wash away the incriminating evidence of your shameful desire in the shower that night! While the girls might be the ones pursuing the girls, we all know that the guy is clearly on board, even if it isn't with the girl of his choice. Which leads me to...
3) The "Bait n Switch" Girl
This girl, like the girl in my last example, might be there with her man for a threesome, but she can take on the role of the "babysitter" as well; she's willing to have fun and "let" her man have fun as long as it's with the girl of HER choice, and it's typically a girl she deems less attractive and/or interesting than she is. If her man shows too much interest in someone she's envious of (for whatever reason), her insecurities take over, and she's done having fun.
*Perfect example: On one particularly busy night I was moving around all over the club. A guy kept staring at me, no matter where I was at, and kept giving me this hopeful look. When I got on stage he immediately put money up. His gf tried to hide it but she was clearly displeased. She was only talking to girls who looked the opposite of me, basically. She promised her man he could get a dance before leaving. While she was in the ladies room he came up to me and tried to quickly get me into a dance. He wanted to hurry before she came back because he knew she'd disapprove of his choice. She caught us and said, "Fine! But I'm watching!" Okay.. Cool. MOST AWKWARD DANCE EVER!!! Not only was she watching us like a hawk, she looked like she wanted to punch me, and I was giving this guy my WORST (which is hard because... How?)! She noticed he was turned on and said, "Wow.. She must be good because you never get hard during dances". At that point I was just praying for the song to end. They practically started to argue, and when the song ended she threw a $20 at me. Then she dragged her man out of the club.. Wow. Seriously, though. That's not how you'll keep him around. J/S.. A word of advice..
1) "The Babysitter"
This is the girl who comes in with her man so she can watch him and make sure he "behaves". Typically this girl is like stripper repellent because we don't want that drama and it's not like she'll "allow" her man to spend any money.. Sometimes if I'm feeling bitchy and a girl's snarl is annoying enough, I WILL go over to her man, and do my more risque floor show. Take my dollar and walk away. Sometimes you'll see these girls immediately jump on their man, give him some weird lap dance, and proceed to make out with him. We get it! He's yours!! Nobody would have taken him from you but thanks for making my work environment exceedingly uncomfortable!
2) The "Pleaser"
This is the girl who will let you take her tits out, stuff dollars in your garter, and simultaneously try to convince you to go home with her and her man. While it's fun to play along, once they've made it clear they're going home with someone (doesn't matter who), the fun stops. Ladies, gentlemen, even if many of us are bisexual, we aren't all hypersexual, or willing to take part in every offer for a threesome that comes along. We'll never admit to having a bf, hubby, etc. There's a reason why we're considered "fantasy" girls; we are here to entertain you and be social, while providing a fantasy that you can spank it to while you wash away the incriminating evidence of your shameful desire in the shower that night! While the girls might be the ones pursuing the girls, we all know that the guy is clearly on board, even if it isn't with the girl of his choice. Which leads me to...
3) The "Bait n Switch" Girl
This girl, like the girl in my last example, might be there with her man for a threesome, but she can take on the role of the "babysitter" as well; she's willing to have fun and "let" her man have fun as long as it's with the girl of HER choice, and it's typically a girl she deems less attractive and/or interesting than she is. If her man shows too much interest in someone she's envious of (for whatever reason), her insecurities take over, and she's done having fun.
*Perfect example: On one particularly busy night I was moving around all over the club. A guy kept staring at me, no matter where I was at, and kept giving me this hopeful look. When I got on stage he immediately put money up. His gf tried to hide it but she was clearly displeased. She was only talking to girls who looked the opposite of me, basically. She promised her man he could get a dance before leaving. While she was in the ladies room he came up to me and tried to quickly get me into a dance. He wanted to hurry before she came back because he knew she'd disapprove of his choice. She caught us and said, "Fine! But I'm watching!" Okay.. Cool. MOST AWKWARD DANCE EVER!!! Not only was she watching us like a hawk, she looked like she wanted to punch me, and I was giving this guy my WORST (which is hard because... How?)! She noticed he was turned on and said, "Wow.. She must be good because you never get hard during dances". At that point I was just praying for the song to end. They practically started to argue, and when the song ended she threw a $20 at me. Then she dragged her man out of the club.. Wow. Seriously, though. That's not how you'll keep him around. J/S.. A word of advice..
Go home and remind him of how you have the same effect on him, rather than fighting the whole way home, and going to bed angry. Put on something sexy, preferably a hot outfit HE likes, or you know he would like, throw his ass on a surface of your choosing, and make him want YOU! Give him the best lap dance of his life and let him lavish you. It'll be fun, I promise! Since that IS what you're pissed off about, right? His natural bodily response to focused stimulation in the general vicinity of his penis seems to be the issue, so take away the current source of the stimulation (stripper), and let him focus his attention toward another source (YOU)! Fuck your man, is all I'm saying, and DO NOT bring in a third; you can't handle it, and you're not ready. You may never be. Moving on..
4) The Wannabe Stripper
I see it all the time. Two girls come in, ask the bouncer if it's okay to watch for a bit, and then they sit at a relatively reclusive table. There's always a customer that inevitably approaches them asking if they're working. No. They came in to see if it's something they might want to do. There are varying types of this girl but in general it's always the same. They're typically very timid, talk shit about every girl that walks by, and almost never approach one of us to ask questions. I'll stop at a table from time to time and ask if they're applying, then ask if they have any questions. They usually don't. It's not that they don't like what they see, but rather that they're just too shy, or lack the confidence. Even I had to do a shot or five when I first started, and when I was a "baby stripper". Pretty much NONE of these girls ever end up working at the club, let alone apply or try out. They may not always talk shit but typically that's part of the package. Ladies, you'll never make it anyway. When girls walk in with attitude, IF they miraculously end up working there, the house girls won't have it. Why? They were disrespected by you and now you want their help? Where on earth do you find people who are willing to help a person who disrespected them? I rest my case.
Last, but certainly NOT least, the illusive..
5) Recruit
This is the girl whom you see getting wild with the dancers, probably taking her top off, and just having a total blast! She's not there to please her man. She's there to have fun.. We LOVE this girl! I try to get them to work at my club especially if they're bangin' hot! Sexy girls attract customers. We all enjoy having fun. Sometimes it's fun to play with another girl's tits after having ours groped all day! Sometimes she'll come up on stage (PER CLUB RULES- IT'S ALWAYS ONLY ALLOWED FOR LADIES- bachelor parties excluded) and let us strip her down. A few times I've successfully recruited girls and other times just realized they are there to have some fun, are open minded, and then go back to their lives. Cool! Girls like that will always get shown lots of love. If other ladies ever wonder why a girl is getting lots of attention when they aren't, that's why! She's not being rude to us. She's not snarling at us. She might even be there with her man and WANTS him to join the fun. We love those couples!!
Honestly, would you want someone coming to your place of business, and treat people like shit? Be miserable? Make you miserable? No? Then why do it to us. We're just doing our jobs, and if we are allowed to do it right, we really are just having fun, and getting paid for it. We won't try to fuck your man. We won't try to take him from you. If anything, you should be THANKING strippers for keeping your man "out of trouble", and sending him home to fuck YOU!
As Chris Rock once so eloquently said, "Someone has to do it. Someone has to take on the responsibility of entertaining the married men of America. Your wife will take care of you, but she ain't gonna entertain you. You try to bring her a pair of clear heels, she'll say *What the fuck is this?! Get this ho shit out my house!*.. Somebody has to do it!"
If you don't want that statement to be true, buy a pole, and BE YOUR MAN'S FANTASY!!
4) The Wannabe Stripper
I see it all the time. Two girls come in, ask the bouncer if it's okay to watch for a bit, and then they sit at a relatively reclusive table. There's always a customer that inevitably approaches them asking if they're working. No. They came in to see if it's something they might want to do. There are varying types of this girl but in general it's always the same. They're typically very timid, talk shit about every girl that walks by, and almost never approach one of us to ask questions. I'll stop at a table from time to time and ask if they're applying, then ask if they have any questions. They usually don't. It's not that they don't like what they see, but rather that they're just too shy, or lack the confidence. Even I had to do a shot or five when I first started, and when I was a "baby stripper". Pretty much NONE of these girls ever end up working at the club, let alone apply or try out. They may not always talk shit but typically that's part of the package. Ladies, you'll never make it anyway. When girls walk in with attitude, IF they miraculously end up working there, the house girls won't have it. Why? They were disrespected by you and now you want their help? Where on earth do you find people who are willing to help a person who disrespected them? I rest my case.
Last, but certainly NOT least, the illusive..
5) Recruit
This is the girl whom you see getting wild with the dancers, probably taking her top off, and just having a total blast! She's not there to please her man. She's there to have fun.. We LOVE this girl! I try to get them to work at my club especially if they're bangin' hot! Sexy girls attract customers. We all enjoy having fun. Sometimes it's fun to play with another girl's tits after having ours groped all day! Sometimes she'll come up on stage (PER CLUB RULES- IT'S ALWAYS ONLY ALLOWED FOR LADIES- bachelor parties excluded) and let us strip her down. A few times I've successfully recruited girls and other times just realized they are there to have some fun, are open minded, and then go back to their lives. Cool! Girls like that will always get shown lots of love. If other ladies ever wonder why a girl is getting lots of attention when they aren't, that's why! She's not being rude to us. She's not snarling at us. She might even be there with her man and WANTS him to join the fun. We love those couples!!
Honestly, would you want someone coming to your place of business, and treat people like shit? Be miserable? Make you miserable? No? Then why do it to us. We're just doing our jobs, and if we are allowed to do it right, we really are just having fun, and getting paid for it. We won't try to fuck your man. We won't try to take him from you. If anything, you should be THANKING strippers for keeping your man "out of trouble", and sending him home to fuck YOU!
As Chris Rock once so eloquently said, "Someone has to do it. Someone has to take on the responsibility of entertaining the married men of America. Your wife will take care of you, but she ain't gonna entertain you. You try to bring her a pair of clear heels, she'll say *What the fuck is this?! Get this ho shit out my house!*.. Somebody has to do it!"
If you don't want that statement to be true, buy a pole, and BE YOUR MAN'S FANTASY!!
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