JUST BECAUSE I HAVE TO DOESN'T ALWAYS MEAN I DON'T WANT TO; I DO.
Some say everything in life is a choice while others continuously insist they have little to no choices. Some believe our choices ultimately define our happiness or our misery. Some say choices that seem right end up being all wrong. There's some truth in all points of view but all have varying levels of judgment behind them.
Telling someone to choose to be happy isn't always the best advice; there's a time and place, depending on circumstance. However, it is never really wrong to advise someone that making a difficult choice COULD ultimately lead to blissful happiness; this leaves room for error and also allows someone to be less likely to blame themselves if things don't go as planned, or hoped.
That said, I found myself in a rough situation the summer of 2013; I was homeless, living on a campground (with showers THANK GOD!!), and had no other choice but to dig up my dancer bag and go back to my home club, even though I thought I was done dancing; my dancer bag has saved me more times than I can remember.. While I took minor breaks, and even tried some other clubs, overall, I'm still there 6+ years later ((originally started there in 2011 but left in 2012)). I was always comfortable with it, and I honestly love it! It has its downfalls, like any job, but right now I just don't see myself doing anything else. I no longer see it as something I have to do because my choices are limited; quite the contrary. Not everyone can say this but a lot of us can. Not everyone is lying when they say they love dancing. I do. I plan on dancing until my body gives out. Do I have other plans? Duh!! Any smart woman in my position would.
With that I'd really like to urge people to STOP "feeling sorry" for us. Stop trying to be the aptly named "Captain Save-A-Ho. I assure you, almost none of us need saving. Most of us do it because we enjoy it, it can be insanely lucrative, the hours are flexible, I'm my own boss, and it allows single moms and young women alike to finish school. What's negative about that?? It's only exploitation if the girl is unwilling, and NO club will force any girl to stay that doesn't want to be there. Managers and owners don't have time for that. Nobody will force a girl to stay against her will; so I think we can all agree that, even on physically/mentally trying days, most of us wouldn't have it any other way. We all dance for our own VALID reasons.
Six years at this particular club and I'm still in the position where options are limited. That doesn't mean anyone ever has to pity me. Why?? Because if I HAD had a choice 6 years ago then I wouldn't have ever discovered my love for dancing. My drive to own my own club. My plan to teach lessons and enter competitions. Without my lack of options I would never have found this passion. Something that brings me joy, fulfillment, and keeps me healthy as an added bonus. I may never have realized my true potential. I would have no book to write. My life would be empty and sad.
So, stop feeling "sorry" for dancers. Stop victimizing us. Stop thinking we hate our lives, have daddy issues, are drug addicts, or felons. That makes up the LOWEST percentage of dancers. The reality is, most are single moms, college students, or both. Some do it because they love it and as much as people refuse to believe it, we can network and make business connections like NO other! A lot of us have brains. I've made thousands of dollars off my 157 IQ and ability to hold a conversation. I have potential investors, a business plan, a book in the works, and I did it all on my own. If it weren't for dancing, I'd be in a bad place, both mentally and physically, and I certainly wouldn't have met the people who will allow me to bring my dreams to fruition. A smart woman in this industry is a dangerous thing and a monumental force to be reckoned with. Boys... You just don't even know. 💜
Telling someone to choose to be happy isn't always the best advice; there's a time and place, depending on circumstance. However, it is never really wrong to advise someone that making a difficult choice COULD ultimately lead to blissful happiness; this leaves room for error and also allows someone to be less likely to blame themselves if things don't go as planned, or hoped.
That said, I found myself in a rough situation the summer of 2013; I was homeless, living on a campground (with showers THANK GOD!!), and had no other choice but to dig up my dancer bag and go back to my home club, even though I thought I was done dancing; my dancer bag has saved me more times than I can remember.. While I took minor breaks, and even tried some other clubs, overall, I'm still there 6+ years later ((originally started there in 2011 but left in 2012)). I was always comfortable with it, and I honestly love it! It has its downfalls, like any job, but right now I just don't see myself doing anything else. I no longer see it as something I have to do because my choices are limited; quite the contrary. Not everyone can say this but a lot of us can. Not everyone is lying when they say they love dancing. I do. I plan on dancing until my body gives out. Do I have other plans? Duh!! Any smart woman in my position would.
With that I'd really like to urge people to STOP "feeling sorry" for us. Stop trying to be the aptly named "Captain Save-A-Ho. I assure you, almost none of us need saving. Most of us do it because we enjoy it, it can be insanely lucrative, the hours are flexible, I'm my own boss, and it allows single moms and young women alike to finish school. What's negative about that?? It's only exploitation if the girl is unwilling, and NO club will force any girl to stay that doesn't want to be there. Managers and owners don't have time for that. Nobody will force a girl to stay against her will; so I think we can all agree that, even on physically/mentally trying days, most of us wouldn't have it any other way. We all dance for our own VALID reasons.
Six years at this particular club and I'm still in the position where options are limited. That doesn't mean anyone ever has to pity me. Why?? Because if I HAD had a choice 6 years ago then I wouldn't have ever discovered my love for dancing. My drive to own my own club. My plan to teach lessons and enter competitions. Without my lack of options I would never have found this passion. Something that brings me joy, fulfillment, and keeps me healthy as an added bonus. I may never have realized my true potential. I would have no book to write. My life would be empty and sad.
So, stop feeling "sorry" for dancers. Stop victimizing us. Stop thinking we hate our lives, have daddy issues, are drug addicts, or felons. That makes up the LOWEST percentage of dancers. The reality is, most are single moms, college students, or both. Some do it because they love it and as much as people refuse to believe it, we can network and make business connections like NO other! A lot of us have brains. I've made thousands of dollars off my 157 IQ and ability to hold a conversation. I have potential investors, a business plan, a book in the works, and I did it all on my own. If it weren't for dancing, I'd be in a bad place, both mentally and physically, and I certainly wouldn't have met the people who will allow me to bring my dreams to fruition. A smart woman in this industry is a dangerous thing and a monumental force to be reckoned with. Boys... You just don't even know. 💜
Comments
Post a Comment