Stupid Shit Guys Say

It happens to every stripper who's ever danced in any club, all around the world. The "I don't want to hurt her feelings, so I'm going to tell a stupid lie to turn down a private dance" guy comes in, and wastes our time!! From excuses not to do private dances to compliments; they're pretty much always the same lame lines. Guys really do believe we have no brains because we're strippers, when in reality the majority are college students, and we are definitely intelligent enough to know that this isn't a career that lasts forever; though some (like myself) are "career strippers", we still have future plans. I, myself, am writing a book. I have an IQ of 157 but due to my mental disabilities, I am hindered a lot more than people think, and most think it's just an excuse. Which is quite ironic considering men who come to strip clubs use the worst and (unknowingly) the same lame excuses/lines every time. Yet we're the stupid ones??

Guys, you're really unoriginal and redundant. Here's an idea... JUST BE HONEST!! Tell the truth; at least in regards to turning down private dances. Take your egos down a notch because you're not hurting our feelings. We don't care what you think of our physical appearance; because every dancer worth a damn knows it takes 95% personality, talent, enthusiasm, and an IQ of over (at least) 100 to be great at this job. "Looks" are (maybe) the other 5% of the job. That's besides the point..

You know what pisses us off? When guys say everything in the world except for the ONE thing we wish they'd actually say; "No". Something along the lines of, "No thank you, I already have a dance lined up", if you're waiting on someone already; or "No thank you.", and tuck $1 in her garter. The excuses are always the same...

*"I just got here, I'm going to wait a while".. (but you take the next girl back that asks). If she's not your "type", just politely say no, because we can kinda see you go back after saying you weren't ready. Seriously? LOL!!

*"I'm about to take off, but next time for sure".. (but you take the next girl back that asks).......

*"I just had a dance, I need to take a break"..
(but you take back the next girl that asks).....

*"I didn't bring much money tonight so I'm gonna take it easy." (but you take back the next girl that asks)...

Can you see where this is headed? For the love of all things holy, could you NOT waste our time by saying, "Come back in a little bit and we will do a few dances", when in reality you have NO intention of taking her back. She's wasting time coming back to you when she could have gotten the guy who just went back with someone else.

Time is money; especially in this industry. Also, if you're going to have a girl sit and talk for 30 minutes when you have no intention on dancing with her, give her a $20 tip or something! Do YOU make $1 in a half hour (or $2/hour) if you're on an hourly wage? I sincerely doubt that!! Even minimum wage for servers is $2.31 (at the lowest), but they work for tips, like we do, except we don't get paid. We actually PAY to work... So stop wasting our time.

My favorite thing to say when guys shower me with compliments (but not money) is, "Compliments don't pay my bills". Tell me I'm beautiful, gorgeous, have the best ass in the world, etc.; cool. Thanks. Don't make us think you're going to dance with us and put your hands all over us, and then say, "No thanks"...

Again, you're wasting our time and costing us money; plus it's rude and disrespectful. If we're letting you grab our asses & thighs because you just want a cheap feel, but don't want to give us $5 or $10, then you're kinda shitty! Just stop. We're really NOT stupid. The guys who say these stupid (and redundant) things, however... They're pretty fucking dumb. We know all the games! The "fake phone call"; really bro? At least turn your phone screen on to make it halfway believable, even though we all know nobody's calling you. Give it up. We know all the moves. Guys play games just as much as girls do. We all know it! 💜

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